Monday, March 31, 2014

Repost or Ur dad will die!

more spam on Instagram - stop it
A small selection of crap I collected in under a week from my honourable IG buddies

So here's my rant on why I have little respect for chain mail / spam / superstitious stuff... this blog is mainly for my 100 or so lovely teenagers whom I occasionally look after in my capacity as a volunteer youth leader.


There are thousands of these things online. Let's pick the latest one that annoyed me on Instagram the other day.... "Repost if u luv your dad or we will die in his sleep".

So is there going to be a colossal paternal mortality epidemic in the next few days? 

What if people don’t have Instagram? - Will their dads die because they didn’t read this message of woe?

Are we talking about millions / billions of Dads around the world? 

What if you repost one day, but then don’t repost the same thing another day in the future - does that mean he’s gonna die in his sleep as soon as you stop reposting? 

You know, let's be honest, the conditions aren’t really laid out properly here. 

Perhaps superstitious chain mail has some unwritten rules that you should just really intrinsically know whereby you have to read it first for it to be true - and until then it isn’t true…. but then, as you repost it, you potentially kill millions of other people’s dads as your friends get to enjoy your poorly screenshotted, appallingly cropped, badly spelled, disinteresting square of nonsense you have put on your IG feed as you repost with an accompanying message / hashtag to the effect of "I know it’s fake but #justtobesafe”.


Look, I’m going to really rant now - so sorry in advance but - if you know it’s fake WHY DID YOU REPOST? - You either know it’s fake or you don’t. You don’t admit that you “know it’s fake” and then repost it anyway!! - Make your mind up! Listen to yourself!

And let’s just unpack the concept of superstition here. Is it just perhaps remotely possible that some utterly thick, boring, uncreative muppet of a slime-person originally compiled this useless patch of weary text and put it up on line because they don’t actually have a life? - Like this is the most exciting thing they’ve ever done?


And if so, look what YOU'RE doing….you are not only actually playing into the hands of a total moron but also you are of course encouraging the propagation of yet more threatening bad luck spam as more lunatics jump on this blind consciousness bandwagon - another fail of a superstitious chain-challenge concocted by yet another brainless dweeb - and round it goes again as you send this stuff to the people you ironically care about the most in Instagram world. Or FB, Twitter… Tumblr... whatever…..

Listen, this is important….. As soon as you repost a spam message, you are THE RESPONSIBLE REPRESENTATIVE of this message - you are not just a simple link in a chain, to use old English, you “stand" for it. You are an ambassador to the claims within. IT BECOMES YOURS. You are not just passing something over that doesn’t affect you.. it DOES affect you - you have validated the statement within by passing it on. You inflict it on everyone else and so I BLAME YOU!!!! - 

Don’t you dare say that someone else sent it - so you’re immune. My friend, please listen, you are just as much to blame as the first person who dredged this detestable pulp from their infantile and throbbing excuse for a brain.


If you pass on a spam message, you become a spammer - of course you do! - Yes I understand that spam is a fact of life, and perhaps really isn’t worth getting upset about…. but look again, what about messages that deliver horrific threats which include statements like “You dad will die in his sleep unless you repost this” - 

What kind of morbid scaremongerer feels the need to contribute such a statement to the world? 
What joy is there to be had for the original author... or anyone? 
Is this funny on any level at all? 
How is it remotely entertaining?
How much of a traitor have you just been to yourself and the true elements within the spiritual world the moment you agree to participate in this?

Superstition has existed for thousands of years - I accept that it is endemic in all cultures. I also accept that it is an inevitable that we all play into its hands at one time or another. I am sure that I have diced with avoiding cracks in a pavement in the past.

So yeah, I get it…. but, when I see a post like this, my heart always sinks. I pity the depths of mankind. I see an example of the poorest and most pathetic excuse for a superstitious pseudo-curse being unleashed on the internet with it’s unsubstantiated and impossible claims requiring a validation from the otherwise discerning masses.


I then see everyone blindly play ball and pass it on….. obviously mainly children or young teens…. but still - how old do you have to be before you hate this crap? And how young do you have to be to suckered into believing it? - I would argue that it is logical, straightforward and all-round easy peasy to never get involved in the first place. There's no need to go through a period of believing it like Santa and the Tooth Fairy.

It's not just mindless... it's horrible because intelligent people are forced to give it the time it doesn't deserve as they scroll through your feed.

I'm no fan of spam, I have slight regard for superstition, I'm unimpressed by poor effort and even bad spelling / grammar - but I loathe, beyond anything else a dumbed down mass of zombies complying to something that doesn’t deserve even noticing - let alone obeying.

Do I make myself clear?

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